Burnham exits UN ‘speed dating’ ‘alive’ with UK’s self-respect intact
US President Donald Trump ‘looked bewildered’ and ‘had never heard of them’ when UK Prime Minister Andy Burnham raised UK sanctions on illegal settlements in the West Bank, according to a Guardian politics sketch by John Crace of their roughly 30-minute meeting on the margins of the UN General Assembly in New York on Tuesday.
Trump publicly criticised only one agenda item — the proposed handover of the Chagos Islands, which he called ‘a terrible idea.’ Burnham replied: ‘We’re looking at it.’ Trump also described Burnham as a ‘great businessperson’ who was ‘a lot nicer and a lot more talented than his predecessor,’ an apparent reference to former prime minister Keir Starmer.
Crace opened the sketch by describing Trump as a “King Baby” — “a five-year-old child with the world as his set of toys” — and portrayed the meeting as “speed dating – one step up from two world leaders shooting the breeze while getting to know each other.” He wrote that Burnham’s “primary aim” was “to get out alive with his – and the UK’s – self-respect intact” and, “whatever he did, not to offer the president a third state visit. Keir Starmer never really lived that one down. Putting out on the first date only encourages the other person to think you’re a pushover.”
Crace characterised Burnham as having “an easy-going self-confidence” that left him “comfortable in his skin in a way that Keir never was. Or maybe the artifice is just better concealed.” Burnham, Crace wrote, “understands that trash-talking is all in a day’s work for most politicians.”
“In the past, he [Burnham] may have called Trump all sorts of things,” Crace wrote. “Poisoned politics. Someone who would be unwelcome in Manchester.” Crace added: “Well, that was then, this is now. Things change. Just like Trump. Now he would be welcoming the US president to the G20 in Manchester next year. Who would have guessed?”
Crace noted that Trump’s US poll ratings were “dire” and that “the midterm elections look like trouble,” adding that “The Donald needs all the friends he can get – even if he had just tried to lose a few more of them in his speech to the UN earlier.” Crace described Trump’s General Assembly address as “even wilder and madder than many of his previous ones” but observed that Trump “hadn’t threatened to invade a Nato country this time” and that “it’s always good to learn of countries you never knew existed. Anyone for ‘Kazakhstan’?”
Crace wrote that “taking questions with Trump afterwards, Andy didn’t look quite as self-assured as usual – he seemed very much on edge,” noting this was Burnham’s “first time as prime minister at the UN” and that “The Donald always has it in him to blow any meeting out of the water.”
On Iran, Burnham urged Trump to pursue a diplomatic settlement. In his General Assembly address earlier the same day, Trump had suggested it was “a toss-up whether he came to a deal with Iran or whether he annihilated it.” Burnham told reporters the war was “causing a massive hit to the cost of living.” Crace wrote that Burnham “chose not to highlight the irony of Trump calling on Volodymyr Zelenskyy to stop bombing Russian refineries as it was playing havoc with the cost of oil. Pots and kettles and all that.”
Burnham also promoted a UK deal with Saudi Arabia to provide Royal Air Force refuelling support for Saudi warplanes, which Crace characterised as an arrangement “where we send one plane to refuel Saudi fighters that don’t need refuelling because their targets are only a few hundred miles away.”
On the Falklands, Crace wrote, Trump “was looking a wee bit bored. Unsure where the Falklands are or why they had been talking about them. Perhaps he was wondering why he was looking even more orange than usual.”
In the question-and-answer session that followed, Trump was asked whether he could do business with Burnham. “Sure he was,” Trump said, calling Burnham a “great businessperson” who was “a lot nicer and a lot more talented than his predecessor.” Crace wrote that the “predecessor” remark appeared to refer to former prime minister Keir Starmer, who, Crace observed, “is still getting rubbished at meetings he would have been attending” and “really can’t buy a break.” Crace added: “But that’s Trump for you. Andy shouldn’t relax too much. That will be him getting trashed one day.”
On immigration, Crace wrote, Burnham was “deftly trying to give credit to the immigrants working in the NHS while going on to condemn illegal immigration.” Trump, Crace wrote, “was just dreaming of walls and border guards.”
A reporter then asked which the prime minister preferred: Manchester or Manhattan. By that point, Crace wrote, Burnham “was feeling a bit more self-assured that the whole thing wasn’t about to go tits up,” and joked about Trump’s earlier characterisation of Manchester as “some town.” “Trump just shrugged. It still is just some town to him,” Crace wrote, “but he wasn’t going to labour the point. He was trying to be on his best behaviour. For a five-year-old.”
On UK sanctions on illegal settlements in the West Bank, Trump “looked bewildered,” Crace wrote. “Had never heard of them.” Burnham insisted he had personally called the White House to inform the president of the UK’s intentions in advance. The sanctions, Burnham told reporters, were intended “to maintain the possibility of a two-state solution and to restore trust in politics.” Crace wrote: “This was more like the authentic Burnham. Standing up for what he believed. Trump said nothing. Maybe he actually did recognise the prime minister as an equal.”
“There was just time for a mention of the proposed handover of the Chagos Islands – ‘It’s a terrible idea,’ said Trump unhelpfully, to which Andy gulped ‘We’re looking at it’ – before we closed with Trump insisting relations with the UK had never been better and that Britain was a country on the up,” Crace wrote. “Some of us could distinctly remember The Donald saying the UK was on the slide only last week. But who’s counting?”
A minder called the improvised presser to a close and “kicked everyone out of the room,” Crace wrote. “Trump looked blank. He often does. Burnham looked relieved. He had got out of his first encounter with the president alive. Both he and the UK were still intact. Chalk this one up as a win.”