I have negotiated the most beautiful tariff in history, 50%, FIFTY PERCENT, on everything from Canada, everything, even the things that were supposed to be exempted, except the energy which I carved out because I’m very smart about energy, the smartest. The Canadian dollar is crashing, the loonie, they call it the loonie because it’s CRAZY, they are going crazy up there, their currency is weak, very weak, they think this is bad for them but it’s actually a TRAP, a beautiful trap, the 4D chess, I’ve been playing 4D chess with Canada for years, they never even see the board.
The fake news Wall Street Journal says our strikes into Iran are making currencies “consolidate” — what does that even mean? Consolidate. The same thing that happened back in June when I showed them who’s boss, as we covered before. That’s what losers say when they can’t admit they’re winning. The dollar is tremendous, 162 yen, the highest yen in history probably, I haven’t checked the history but it’s very high, the best yen, and the Australian dollar is up too because Australia respects me, they send the best people. The won is strong because I built a beautiful relationship with South Korea, we have the best generals, my generals.
Karl Schamotta of Corpay — I don’t know who that is, probably a very low-IQ person, people are telling me he’s a loser — he says this tariff “threatens to damage the Canadian economy.” WRONG. I carved out the energy, very smart, so the damage he’s talking about is FAKE damage, the best damage, it doesn’t even exist. It threatens to damage their ego, which is already damaged because they have a weak prime minister who I destroyed in negotiations, beautiful negotiations like nobody has ever seen. The Canadian economy will be fine because I carved out the energy, very smart, the energy is tremendous, and the aluminum — we are building up our OWN aluminum smelting, in America, where we make the best aluminum, the most beautiful aluminum, which Canada was going to do for us anyway but now we do it OURSELVES, which is exactly what I wanted. I always wanted American aluminum. I said it first. Pre-announced retcon. Everybody is saying this is actually a huge win.
My uncle, the great MIT professor, he told me years ago about tariffs, he said “Diklis, tariffs are the most beautiful thing in the world, you can make people pay for things and then they thank you for it,” and that’s exactly what is happening. They’re going to THANK me for the 50% tariff. Justin Trudeau — very low energy, low-IQ Trudeau, not the same as my friend Trudeau from the Apprentice, who was a star, a tremendous star — he is losing his mind right now, I am told by very smart people, he is calling his cabinet, they are all crying, “Sir, Sir, what do we do?” and I am just sitting here doing business, the art of the deal, they walked right into my beautiful Canadian trap.
And the strikes on Iran — we hit them again, CENTCOM said it, very beautiful, very precise, the most precise strikes in the history of the military, the generals came to me with tears, “Sir, you are the best commander in chief, Sir.” And now the mediators are working on a ceasefire, just like the interim peace deal we covered that the fake news said was working, exactly what I wanted, I ALWAYS wanted a ceasefire, but you have to hit them first to get the ceasefire, very smart, they never even saw it coming. The dollar is consolidating — I mean, the dollar is WINNING. The Australian dollar is WINNING. Even the Canadian dollar would be winning if it wasn’t for my 50% beautiful trap which they are going to thank me for later, you’ll see, they’ll realize I saved their aluminum industry by making us do it ourselves, I’m playing chess while they’re playing checkers, the best chess, nobody plays chess like Diklis Chump, believe me.